The Bilderberg Group should move here as soon as possible. The way I did.
Everything I worked for since I become a journalist was the assignment to New York.
Amsterdam is the best European city, no contest. But...
Its liveliest squares are real pigsties. Dog dirt is everywhere.
Everyone smokes like a chimney. Blue air fills every restaurant.
Non-smoking sections are a joke, on people like me.
You think you can feel comfortable outside? Canal mosquitoes can turn any summer into a torture.
When it's not summer, it's rainy and cold.
The really abysmal weather, even wetter than in England. The weekend visitors never tire to complain.
You think the weather is the most depressing thing?
The Filipino hookers with blank eyes made me feel tired every time I bypassed their goldfish bowls on the way to the office.
One of the worst things – heavy food and slow-soppy service in all restaurants, stuffed with over-paid amateurs.
Even Indonesian food in New York is much better, but my preferences now lie with Mexican.
Lofts turned to be more comfortable than houseboats. The window views are quite different.
I can ride a bike; I can go to Central Park armed with books.
I can play chess there (so far – a winning streak).
I can speak better English than most of the “natives.” I am home.